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Giant Stress Cake, feeds four


  • one or two weeks of poor quality sleep
  • a generous sprinkle of overtime at work
  • as many tight deadlines as you can find at your local store, they’re in season so grab a good handful
  • too little time out with friends
  • a couple of good quality mis-understandings, ones that have aged and had time to mature properly are preferable


Take your lack of sleep as a base for the cake, flavour by sprinkling in your overtime and tight deadlines, all the while stirring the mixture. Once the main part of the cake is mixed you should take one of the seasoned misunderstandings (a long standing irritation will do if misunderstandings are short), and beat into the mix. Be careful, those misunderstandings can make your eyes water! Place in an oven at 200C and cook for about a week. While this is baking prepare and partake in the morose qualities of not seeing friends often enough. You’ll have worked up quite a sweat by now and the potency of all the ingredients will be maturing nicely. Once the main cake is baked take that last misunderstanding and drizzle over generously. If you can find a romantic misunderstanding this will set the cake off perfectly, but any high quality slow matured misunderstanding will work well.

You may now serve your Giant Stress Cake.

Ideally should be served with a glass of “You Utter Arse” brand Regret for everyone to enjoy.

The main benefit of the Giant Stress Cake is the clarity it brings once fully digested. It’s a great way to clean the system, but beware of damage to friendships, you’ll have to check back on your guests after the meal is served to ascertain any long term effects. If required you may bake some Humble Pie, the recipe is on page 413.


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  1. Joel B posted -2166sec after the entry and said:

    This is just genius.

  2. kevadamson posted -1844sec after the entry and said:

    Aw man. Sorry to hear you've had a rough couple of weeks, but it's to your credit that you've splashed some humour over it all.

    Tell you what. Have a site down and I'll do the washing up for you (metaphorically speaking of course) smiley icon: smile

  3. Matt Wilcox posted 11hrs, 53min, 49sec after the entry and said:

    Heh, cheers guys smiley icon: smile

    *passes Kev the Fairy Liquid*

  4. Thomas1 posted 167 days, 20hrs, 45mins after the entry and said:

    Hi Matt,

    unfortunately, I don't see any other way of contacting you since the form on the about page is disabled.

    I'd like to exchange a few words with you concerning alternate stylesheets. If you are interested, please contact me.


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